Getting Support in ABDLCircle

1. 🫂 #cuddle-me-crisis & #spicy-soggy-feels

These are the main “big feelings” channels. They exist so you don’t have to hold it alone — and so heavier topics don’t overflow into lighter spaces.

• #cuddle-me-crisis🫂 – gentler language, focusing on comfort, validation, grounding, and “I see you.”
• #spicy-soggy-feels🌶️ – still trauma-aware, but may contain heavier details and more intense venting.

Each channel includes a pinned message pointing to external crisis and support resources. For more links, see the Resources & Support page.

2. 🎟️ Opening a Support Ticket

Tickets are private threads between you and staff (and sometimes a small number of helpers, if you agree). They’re useful when:

• You’re worried about someone’s safety or behavior.
• You’ve experienced harassment or boundary violations.
• You need help navigating a conflict.
• You’re confused or scared about something that happened here.

You can open a ticket using the ticket panel in the server (look for a channel with ticket buttons). Pick the category that feels closest (support, report, appeal, etc.). If you’re unsure, choose “support” — you don’t have to be precise.

Staff may be in different time zones and have their own mental health limits. We can’t always reply instantly, but we do read, we do care, and you’re not ignored.

3. 🛡️ What Staff Can and Can’t Do

Staff in ABDLCircle are humans with their own trauma histories, disabilities, and limits. They are not therapists, lawyers, or crisis clinicians.

Staff can:

• Listen, validate, and reflect what they’re hearing.
• Help with boundaries inside the server (mutes, removals, etc.).
• Clarify rules, expectations, and how moderation decisions work.
• Offer ideas for grounding or self-soothing, from lived experience.

Staff cannot:

• Give medical, psychiatric, or legal advice.
• Diagnose you or the person you’re worried about.
• Guarantee outcomes in offline situations (family, work, etc.).
• Replace therapy or emergency services, especially in active crisis.

Staff will sometimes say “this is bigger than what we can safely hold here” — not because you’re too much, but because Discord isn’t built to be a crisis unit, and we want you alive and okay.

4. 💌 How to Ask for Help (Even When You’re Shaky)

You don’t need perfect words. But here are some prompts that might make it easier:

• “I’m not sure if this fits here, but something happened and I’m scared/confused.”
• “I’m not in immediate danger, but I’m very overwhelmed and could use gentle support.”
• “This might be a small thing, but it’s sticking to my brain and I need help un-sticking it.”
• “I think I’m in crisis. I’m safe for the moment, but I’m scared of where my brain might go.”

If words are hard, it’s okay to say: “I don’t know how to explain this yet, but I need someone to sit with me.”

5. 🧱 When Staff Say “No” or Set Limits

Sometimes staff will:

• Redirect a conversation to the appropriate channel (#cuddle-me-crisis / #spicy-soggy-feels).
• Ask to pause a topic that is affecting others in the space.
• Tell you they need to log off or step away, even if things are still messy.

Those boundaries are not a verdict on your worth. They are staff practicing emotional hygiene — so they don’t burn out or accidentally pass their own hurt onto others.

6. 🌍 External Support & Crisis Resources

If you are in immediate danger, please contact local emergency services if it is safe to do so. For more region-specific crisis lines and mental health support, check:

findahelpline.com — a directory of free, confidential helplines in many countries.

For more curated links about mental health, queer support, and kink & consent education, see our Resources & Support page.